Monday, February 19, 2001

Letter from King's Office Of Ministry and Tourism
Monday, February 19, 2001
Kathmandu, The Kingdom Of Nepal

Dear Sir Kozodoy,

The Ministry of Tourism would like to inform you that Ms. Rachel S. (they never tell us their real middle names!) Thurston has returned safely from the Annapurna Circuit before the hordes of trekkers from Europe descend on our little sovereign kingdom. Why she and her mother chose to trek in the Himalayas during the middle of the winter is something we can only attribute to poor reasoning we see often from those usually coming from Italy and Russia. Perhaps they are rare North American specimens. (A little talkative as well.)

We are happy to inform you that she will be returning to Santa Barbara shortly and quite happily--though she has very much enjoyed her travels in Nepal, she sees no need for her presence here any longer in Nepal as we're not keen on public massages nor do we serve "very tasty pizza" and we are lacking a store called "Trader Joe's," what Ms. Thurston has called "God's gift to this fine world second to chocolate."

We hope that you are in good health in the country of Amerika and that you and your compatriates now have a president you can trust. Though from our humble experience we see that as being doubtful.

Ms. Thurston is busy on the streets of Kathmandu shopping and stuffing herself with whatever delicacies she can't find on the other side of the planet and sends her regards. She's spoken of you fondly and of her much loved friends in the town of Santa Barbara which you call a “Paradise.”

If you like, we would be happy to send you any relevant information you and your kind friends would like if you are considering a trip to our proud Himalayan Kingdom.

Good health to you and your family,
Ram Shaba-Ratri,
Officer of the Ministry of Tourism,
With gratitude to His Highness Birendra Bikram